Kaity Update

Friends,

Sorry for allowing so much time to go by since the last update. Many of you have asked for the latest regarding Kaitlyn and we want to keep you all informed. Both Terra and I have a couple of other blog posts percolating inside of us so maybe we'll find the time this week to write down those thoughts and share those with you.

We had about two weeks recovery following Kaity's surgery where life returned to a bit of normalcy. It seemed strange after a whirlwind of appointments and procedures to just wait. She recovered very very well and has bounced back to the life of a two-year-old. We were able to go camping as a family last weekend, return to the pool and in many respects live life without major changes. 

The final pathology report returned on the tumor and it turns out that Kaityln's cancer is the more mature and aggressive form of neuroblastoma. Catching this early and being able to completely remove the known tumor has been an incredible blessing as this can spread very quickly and it can be difficult to turn back the clock at a certain point with this type of cancer. At this time they believe they got it all out but will watch her closely for any re-growth of the tumor or for the cancer to appear somewhere else. All other tests, including a bone scan last Tuesday, came back negative. God's merciful hand has been on our daughter. We are grateful for His grace and the skill and thoroughness of the medical professionals that caught and treated this.

We will be having another MRI in the near future, sort of "before" and "after" shots of where the tumor was in her abdomen. At this point, there are no other treatments scheduled other than very detailed follow-up and watching her very carefully for any re-appearance of the cancer. 

This has definitely been an interesting summer. As we prepare for our older two to begin school this week we can look back on what was at times a very challenging few months. But we know it could have been much worse. We are grateful for how God has displayed his faithfulness in our lives through all of you. Thank you for the love and support and prayers. We have been so encouraged to walk through this situation with you by our sides.

We'll continue to post updates as things progress and let you all know if anything changes.

Kyle

Grateful for good news!

Update on Kaity. We were able to come home late yesterday and while still a bit tender Kaity is quickly bouncing back. You can tell she is feeling better when the occasional whining sneaks out along with the millionth "why Daddy" and the resurgence of her made-up knock-knock jokes! Her brothers and sister are happy to have her home and are coddling her to no end.

We heard back from the oncologist and got the preliminary pathology report this afternoon. All this information will have to be confirmed and the tumor is being sent to Denver for examination as well. There is a possibility Kaity may have a full body bone scan next week as a follow-up imaging procedure. The lab in Denver will also conduct genetic testing of the affected cells to determine additional information on the nueroblastoma. 

There is a neuroblastic spectrum with two primary families ranging from ganglioneuroma (the benign "safe" kind) to the more aggressive neuroblastoma type. Kaity's tumor is sorta in the middle and is being termed a ganglioneuroblastoma. At this point she is considered a Stage One (the lowest risk category). If nothing new is revealed over the next week or so then Kaity would have no immediate treatment plan and they would simply watch her carefully in the coming months to check for a re-growth of the tumor.

This could have easily grown into something much more troublesome, even a few months of this growing unchecked and unseen may have changed where we are. God's providence is amazingly good in Kaity's life. We continue to be incredibly grateful for having caught this so early, for the thoroughness of our medical providers and their aggressive treatment once this was discovered. 

Kaity still has several weeks to fully recover and probably multiple follow-up appointments but this is wonderfully good news for our daughter. As parents we are of course relieved, we're also very aware of God's grace and provision during this season. Thank you all for your prayers and love. It has been unbelievable and indescribable. 

Kyle & Terra

Embracing Weakness

I think the hardest thing for me in these past few weeks has been feeling completely helpless and out of control. Most of my day-to-day living somehow helps maintain the charade that I’m in control of my world. I’m good at what I do. I can usually bend a situation to my will and get out of it what I want. In short, I’ve gotten quite good at controlling my world.

But this feeling of control is merely a façade, an illusion. In reality, I’ve come to realize that I’ve never really ever been in control; even when in my arrogance I pretend I am. We either serve a sovereign God, Lord of universe, who causes and directs the ways of man or we don't. There is no middle ground on this one.  How am I living? Do I demonstrate by my actions that I trust in Almighty God and His plans for my family? Or do I clutch at straws to somehow project that I’ve got it altogether, that I’m in control and I can make it all happen the way it “should” from my feeble perspective?

By embracing my humanity and weakness I allow the Spirit of God to manifest His power. In my weakness His strength is made perfect. The moment when I embrace my inabilities is the precise moment when I’m empowered to operate in His strength.

It’s such a paradox and a challenging one for my faith. But the gospel is in fact paradoxical. To be first you are called to be last. To save your life you must lose it. To find strength you must embrace weakness.

In a situation like today, where I sat in a waiting room for almost four hours waiting for the doctor to walk through the door and tell me about the tumor inside my daughter I came face to face with the stark realization, whether I wanted to or not, that I am not in control. So…am I willing to give up that “control” that I never had in the first place?

“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.”

-Jim Elliot

I’ve always been a huge Elliot fan. Talk about a man who lived what he believed. What a spectacular example of an unshakeable belief in a really big God. He knew what it was to believe in a sovereign God, even in the tough times. He also knew how to not only accept his inabilities but to boldly embrace his weakness.

“Wherever you are, be all there! Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God…the will of God is always a bigger thing than we bargain for, but we must believe that whatever it involves, it is good, acceptable and perfect.”

-Jim Elliot

I believe this situation with little Kaitlyn Shea to be the will of God. Therefore, it is good, acceptable and perfect. And, therefore, God is in control, not me. He knows the plans He has for me and my family. He directs the path that Kaitlyn will walk. And ultimately, when I concede, and rest in His perfect control, then His strength is made perfect in my weakness. Will I embrace it?

Successful Surgery

Post-Surgey Update for Family and Friends:

Thank you for all the love and support and prayers for our family today. We truly felt surrounded by angels and had incredible peace during Kaity's procedure. 

The doctors were able to completely remove the adrenal tumor. They also performed a bone marrow biopsy to check that as well. The tumor measured about 3.5cmx3.5cm and was directly behind her kidney. The surgeon was initially concerned about the proximity of the renal vein and another "rogue" vein in the area. He felt there was a high probability they would have to make a pretty wide incision to work around the obstacles to get to the tumor. We're very blessed that it turned out that he was able to do the entire procedure via laparoscope which was minimally invasive, was not a large incision, and will make recovery time much faster. The surgeon was very pleased with the result and the complete removal of the mass. 

 

Kaity is now out of recovery and in the pediatrics ward at Memorial Hospital. She is pretty drugged up and in some pain but seems to be resting comfortably. We are here for at least tonight and about a 50/50 chance we will be here tomorrow night as well. All depending on her recovery tomorrow. We expect results on the bone marrow biopsy and the pathology report on the mass by the end of this week which will dictate the next treatment steps. 

Thank you all for your love and prayers. They have been much appreciated. Many of you have been incredibly helpful, we're grateful for those of you watching our other kids, bringing us meals, and loving on us so well. We are a blessed family.

#Living Life

Kyle & Terra

Magic vs Mighty

Hear the word of the Lord from James 5.

13Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. 14Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. 16Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. 17Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. 18Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit.

This morning the elders of our church anointed Kaitlyn with oil and prayed for healing for the cancer in her body. There is nothing magical or mystical about anointing but there is something mighty about it. Our prayers are powerful and accomplish much. The King James says they availeth much. Our prayers and corporate act of worship this morning appropriates the grace and power of God in the life of Kaity and our family. We believe in the might of prayer and the power of the Spirit. We believe in a God who heals and stood firm in that faith this morning.

We are grateful for a Bible-believing church and the prayers of the saints on behalf of our daughter. Thank you Village Seven for living out the gospel in a practical way to our family this morning. We believe with you for God’s will to be accomplished and stand in faith, believing for healing for Kaitlyn.

Little Acts of Love

I write this over a morning cup of coffee on a beautiful Saturday morning. The boys are up (as usual) and the girls are all still sleeping. This morning I'm amazed and almost overwhelmed by God's love for Terra and I as demonstrated through His people. A friend from church volunteered her daughter to babysit last night (Thank you Miss Brittany, the kids love you!) and some anonymous friend left us a gift card to Outback. Frankly, it was a long tiring week and the ability to get a date night and one that didn't cost us anything was exactly what we needed. We honestly didn't talk about Kaity or surgery much at all. We spent time just being together and decompressing. We had a really good time.

I don't want to blow it out of proportion but it really is the little things that mean so much right now. Another friend from church came over yesterday to help Terra catch up on the household chores. It's tough to keep up on laundry and the vacuuming when you spend two days in Denver. It was not only helpful to get the work done but Laura was a wonderful encouragement to Terra during her time here, what a blessing.

We've been the recipient of so many little acts of love we couldn't begin to name them all. Just know friends and family that we thank you for all you're doing to walk with us. Its been tough to really rest this week and last night was truly peace for our hearts and rest for our souls. I slept better last night than I have all week and awoke feeling refreshed.

It was right after the little act of love and service of the washing of His disciples feet when Jesus said in John 13, "This is how the world will know that you are my disciples, that you love one another." Thank you friends for your incredible display of love; what a witness to an unbelieving world. The little acts of love are powerful and mean much, thank you!

In Need of Grace

I have recently found myself extremely on edge and tired. No wonder, you say, considering all that we are going through. But it has caused me to stop and wonder. Why? Why am I on edge and nervous? Is it because of Kaity? All the tests and procedures? The disrupted schedule? Nothing has seemed to fit.

This morning I was feeling particularly nervous as we headed to Children’s Hospital for Kaity’s MiBG scan. I started once again to run through the possible reasons why. It hit me at the corner of Idalia and Iliff… I was concerned about me. I knew I was overly tired and entering a relatively unknown environment. I say relatively because, as a registered nurse for nine years of my adult life, hospitals were more home to me then anywhere else. I get energized by hospitals and I know what to expect. I was usually the one in control.

What was disconcerting to me was that I wanted to somehow maintain that control. Boiled down…I didn’t want to need grace today; I wanted to make sure that in every interaction I had with people at the hospital that I was the one setting the agenda. I didn’t want to need the grace of the admissions clerk as I fumbled for my ID or insurance card. I didn’t want to need the grace of the Radiology staff as I struggled to provide the right information, but not too much. I didn’t want to need the grace of the cafeteria staff as I became just one more tired frazzled parent trying to carry stuffed animals, blankets, bags, and my lunch. I like to be the one giving the grace, not needing it. Why?

When grace is such a wonderful gift of God and evidence of His love for us, why do we resist it? The short answer, pride. Somehow, especially for me in the area of medicine, I want to handle this myself. To claim some sort of superiority over others because I am more familiar with the situation. But at the end of the day, I need grace just like anyone else. And God in His faithfulness always provides. Perhaps the staff at Children’s were silently rolling their eyes at just another fumbling, overly tired parent, but they didn’t show it. Instead we were treated with kindness, respect and grace. I saw and felt Jesus today in a way I didn’t want to, but oh so desperately needed to. And because of this grace I came home today and slept soundly for 3 hours. I now feel clear headed, more rested, and at peace. I know I will still need more grace in the days ahead, but I am confident that the grace will be there for me.

#Living Life